OPINION

Black People to Whites:

We Don’t Hate You


Dear White People,

Rev. Jeremiah Wright is back in the news, thanks to his interview with Bill Moyers and his speech to the NAACP and we know that once again he’s making you pretty nervous. So we all got together and decided it was time to say something to you, something we probably should have said a long time ago.
We don’t hate you.

That’s right, we don’t hate you, white people. In fact, we like you. We really, really like you. A lot.
See, white people, we know that underneath your anger and outrage, you’re just very, very sensitive. You can’t bear the thought that black people might be holding some kind of grudge against you. Just thinking about it hurts your feelings. We understand. We do, really!
We get it. You think we’re angry and that makes you feel bad and then you get angry back. We know we haven’t said this before but we feel really, really bad that you feel bad. It must be hard to be so sensitive but that’s one of the things we admire about you. The funny thing is that it’s all one big misunderstanding. We’re not angry at all. Slavery, Jim Crow, segregation, lynch mobs and the KKK? We are like, so totally over all of that.
We know sometimes it looks like we’re angry, but really, we’re not – not with you, anyway. It’s probably just something we ate, or maybe we got stuck in traffic or our cable TV is out. There are lots of reasons we could be feeling grumpy or irritable, but none of them is you. We certainly don’t blame you for any of the things that have happened to us since our ancestors were dragged here in chains 400 years ago. We know none of it is your fault. Not one bit!
And Jeremiah Wright? We keep telling you, he’s retired. And he’s old. And oh, yeah – did we mention that he has a really bad case of athlete’s foot? That would make anyone seem angry.
Oh, white people, the truth is, not only are we not angry with you in the slightest, not only do we really like you, but we want to be your friends. Really, we do – all of us. Best friends forever. Because we think you’re cool. Really.
So just to make it absolutely clear, we don’t hate you, not one little bit. Okay?
Now will you vote for Barack Obama?

Your Friends (we really mean it),
Black People


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